...while being busy

I get reminded of what a liar I am every time my kids ask for a snack or a treat but I am too busy, annoyed, or lazy to get it for them. "Mom, can I have some more chips?" "No, they are gone. Go play." Lie number one. "Can I see that it's gone Mommy?" Hmmm, she obviously knows this trick. I've duped her before into thinking something was gone when, in fact, I just didn't want her to have it or I didn't want to go get it. "You dont need to go look, I told you they were gone. Believe me, they are gone." Lie number two. Without a word she gently turns around and heads toward the kitchen. I know what she's doing and in my head I rehearse my next lie. She shows up a few minutes later with the bag of chips, obviously still full of chips. She holds it in front of me with a somewhat accusatory expression on her face. "Oh, I thought they were gone, I thought your dad finished them last night." Lie number 3. "Can I have some?" "Ehhhhhh, fine." I act annoyed, hoping she would think I was upset that she kept asking even though I told her they were gone, and that I was doing her a favor by backing down and giving into her, showing her that I am a super nice mommy. In all actuality, I was just being lazy, figuring she would accept the lie and go do something else, or she would fetch the treat herself, getting me off the hook. I'm such a big fat liar. Bad Sarah, Bad.

...while studying kindergarten poilitics

There is some kind of underground toy trade going on amongst the children. Little did we know, that the school district has an extensive network of kindergartners forming secret alliances, coordinating deals and offers, gifts and threats, bartering and demanding while on the busses to and from school. My daughter comes home with a pony I have never seen, and one of her horses is missing. The next day she came home with a barbie, and one of her Zoobles is gone. These were the first signs of the secret toy trade recently brought to light. Through my strategically placed first grade spies, I learned that most of the deals went on between busses 474 and 516, and there were three children running the deals. The pieces were falling into place and it was almost time to strike. One day it all came to a head. My own daughter was heading the organization! She flew out of the bus with panic on her face. Sweat dripped from her brow as she tried to catch her breath. "She's going to do it, she really is! She's going to throw away the Princess Luna my little pony!!!" The drama was intense. "She said we were no longer friends, and that I would never see that pony again!!" It was time to put an end to this secret, underground toy trading network. We ran as fast as we could back to the house, hearts racing, huffing and puffing as if being chased by a rabid dog. I threw open the door, grabbed the phone, and contacted the other governments involved with the investigation. After a brief telephone discussion the situation was diffused, and the ring of terror had been disolved. Backpacks were to be checked every morning before getting on the bus and any toys found will be confiscated. The kindergarten masterminds will sit separately, placed between two second graders for both protection and control. Through careful planning and cooperative communication, the toy trade was successfully shut down.